When me and my husband first started planning to have a family one thing I was absolutely committed to doing was making sure that we sat down and all ate dinner together at the kitchen table…probably because I vaguely remember reading once how important it was to creating a bond with your kids and that all made sense to me at the time. And for a long time I did it! I made that part of our daily routine as much as I could…..and then my boys started sports. For a while I carried around a lot of guilt for not being able to keep our family dinners going, for letting the boys eat at the kitchen island or at their desk on the rare nights that we were all home together, for the many trips to Dairy Queen for late night hot dogs…but like a lot of things, after I turned 40 a few years ago that guilt ended up on my metaphorical “who the hell cares” pile. Who the hell cares what about the “expectations” of parents from decades ago when your reality is a family with two working parents and a buttload of after school activities! I’d rather hold onto the memory of sitting in the stands on a warm summer night cheering on my eldest’s baseball team and giving my youngest money to get a pretzel from the snack stand then what meal we all sat down for on a random Tuesday night. So what if dinner around the table is going to be few and far between for the next few years? Now we bond during talks in the car on our way to and from games, nights watching movies together, and of course over late night Dairy Queen hot dogs.

But since we still gotta eat – and because I still love spending time in kitchen – I try to set aside a day every other weekend to cooking with and prepping the fruits and veggies I get from our local CSA (in fact I have a whole page dedicated to some of my fav recipes from over the years). I used to stress about the fresh produce going bad before I got a chance to use it but I invested in these reusable storage bags two summers ago and they are a gamechanger! Another gamechanger that I’ve been meaning to recommend forever is the best recipe storage app I’ve ever used – CopyMeThat. It lets you save recipes from any website directly to your collection, easily lets you sort/rate/favorite your recipes, find recipes by ingredient, creates meal plans and shopping lists, all for free! If you’re more into growing things than cooking things in the summer you should also check out my friend Angela’s Blog and Newsletter – Wild Revival Garden and Home. We all know I don’t grow things, but I love reading her advice on growing locally and sustainably as well as her thoughts on the history of gardening and its connection to larger political issues like climate change and equity.

This month I finally had the time to help out a good friend of mine fix her fireplace surround which was beginning to completely pull away from the wall. As soon as I started to remove the exterior and get a look at the structure I quickly realized that I was going to have to re-build the entire interior framework because the person (a professional) that she hired skimped on materials and apparently all concept on how to build a sound structure. In the end it worked out as I was able to give her the design that she actually asked for and wanted (yeah he “forgot” that too) so it worked out and I’m glad I could help her — but the truth is I shouldn’t have had to! The hard truth is that no matter how much research you do on the Professionals that you hire to work on your home – how many references you check, how much past work you see, how charming they are on your first meeting – you never know until they’re actually in your home if they’re going to be a good hire or not….and whether they are going treat you with respect or not ESPECIALLY if you are a woman! My three pieces of advice whenever you hire someone to do work on your home — 1) Be firm in what you’re looking to have done and question their experience doing that exact job if their responses seem vague, 2) Be patient (if it’s a weeklong job they’re not going to be painting on day one) but also not afraid to question things that seem out of place or headed in the wrong direction, 3) Phone a friend!! If things seems really off or you’re getting a ton of pushback reach out to someone who has experience either with home projects or with hiring professionals for home projects for a second opinion. Bottom line – Don’t let the people you hire and pay and trust with your home gaslight you into settling for less than what you agreed on.

• Backlash: The Undeclared War Against American Women By Susan Faludi – FAV NON-FICTION
• Mary Jane By Jessica Anya Blau – FAV FICTION
• The Brown Sisters Series by Talia Hibbert
  • Get a Life, Chloe Brown
  • Take a Hint, Dani Brown
  • Act Your Age, Eve Brown